How To Effectively Stand Up For Yourself All The Time!

Many women struggle to stand up for themselves. This may be especially true for Black women and other women of color, who often face discrimination and other societal disadvantages.

But not standing up for yourself can have plenty of negative long-term consequences that can be difficult to recover from. If you’re trying to build your self-esteem and to operate with more self-confidence on a day-to-day basis, then know that you can.

Oftentimes, it’s a matter of changing your beliefs and your behaviors. Here’s a look at how you can do just that.

Stop Apologizing

How many times have you apologized for something that you shouldn’t apologize for, like when you arrive at a door at the same time as someone else. Why do you apologize for something like that instead of just saying, “Excuse me?”

This may seem like an odd question to ask until you think about the ramifications of each response. “Excuse me” allows you to acknowledge the person’s presence and is polite. “I’m sorry” means that you have no right to be in that space at the same time as the other person who got to the door at the same time you did.

Apology-based behavior represents a fundamental belief that permeates everything you do. If you do not believe that you have the right to be where you are, your self-esteem takes a hit.

It means you do not value yourself. This belief, often hidden from our conscious awareness, is what makes us not go for promotions, not stand up for ourselves when someone wrongs us, etc.

Don’t Confuse Being Assertive for Being Aggressive

Many women shy away from being assertive because of the negative connotations that come with it. They’re afraid of being called a bitch if they stand up for themselves.

Aggressiveness implies attacking and disrespect. Assertiveness allows you to express your opinions, to take up space if you will, without denying others their right to do the same thing.

If you don’t know the difference, then you may not be willing to call people out on discriminatory behavior at work or in other settings. For example, if you’re injured on the job, and you get no restitution, then it’s your right to follow legal channels to get restitution.

Filing a suit for compensation after suffering a severe injury or discrimination is not being aggressive, it’s being assertive.

Participate in Regular Physical Activity

Being physically strong has some direct correlations to feeling mentally and emotionally strong. Those who practice regular physical fitness activities report having higher levels of self-esteem. The reasons for this are myriad.

For one thing, moving your body helps to release endorphins, which are your body’s feel-good chemicals. For another thing, exercising improves your appearance and your strength levels. From a mental standpoint, you often feel mentally stronger when you look good and are physically stronger.

Finally, exercise boosts your mental abilities because it gives your brain a jolt of oxygen. The more oxygen you have in your brain, the better you think. Having this kind of power at your disposal when you’re under pressure can prove invaluable.

If you’re smarter, then chances are you’ll be able to think on your feet, which in turn will make you feel more confident.

Learning how to stand up for yourself takes practice, but it’s definitely worth it to learn how to do it. Not doing so means that you won’t stand up for yourself when you’re facing discrimination or unkind behavior.

It also means that you may not ask for a promotion or for the benefits that you’ve earned. It’s a mental attitude that permeates everything you think about.

Therefore, if you want to be more empowered, it is to your benefit to learn how to be assertive in your day-to-day life.

You don’t have to be silent! Let us help you be heard!