Ask A Black Girl: Why do Black women hate their natural hair?

What’s not to love?

Q: Why do Black women act as though having a relaxer and getting a weave is better than the natural hair our creator gave to us?

– Tiara

Ella Yo: For me personally, I love my natural hair, but I cannot deny that styling it is often a challenge. It’s very time consuming, shrinkage is real and when I get it to hold a style, the count down immediately begins (Me vs Frizz, knots and more shrinkage.)

I have met women who manage their natural looks fearlessly and beautifully but every now and again, I do get a weave to give myself a break. I try to do a curly look or something that mimics a natural look but with much less maintenance required.

Natural Hair, Don’t Care!

More Black Women Are Embracing Their Natural Hair

BLACK HAIR: A taboo subject all over the world. Some Black women prefer a relaxer or a weave simply because it makes their hair easier to deal with, depending on their natural texture.

Combing and taking care of natural hair takes a lot of time. It’s beautiful and very versatile but it can be a pain in the ass for many of us.

On the other hand, many of us have been brainwashed to aim for the White ideal of beauty; long flowing hair that blows in the wind and hangs down our back. For this reason getting a perm has been a rite of passage for most of us.

A weave or relaxer being better than natural nappy, kinky, or coily hair is a matter of opinion and taste.

I wear my hair in a TWA (Teeny Weenie Afro) so I have little to no maintenance but my daughter rocks a head full of beautiful thick kinky locks. She loves her hair but her daily hair routine can be tiring.

She’s 15-years-old and we’ve only found a couple of hair products (Pink Oil and African Pride) that moisturize her hair just right and makes it easier to manage.

In the last decade or so there has been a natural hair revolution taking place as Black women are learning how to take care of their natural hair and realizing just how harsh straightening chemicals are.

Natural Black Hair Makes White America Uncomfortable

White America and their fragility and privilege; it makes me sick!

It’s really not us that acts like weave or straight hair is better than natural hair.

We are constantly being made to feel that what grows out of our head naturally is ugly, unprofessional, or unappealing.

Check out these headlines:

Why Do Black Women Go Blonde?

I’m blonde and I’m fine as hell!


Theresa Gonsalves: For me blonde accents my skin tone and gives me an overall glow of beauty.

Kim Fowlkes: I love my blonde!!! I did it just for a change and I loved it. It’s been 4 years now. I don’t know if I ever want to have a full head of dark hair again.

Walethia Aquil: I have blonde wigs. I never thought I would go blonde. I’m amazed, my skin glows.

White People Don’t Own The Rights To Blonde Hair

We can’t even change our hair color without White America losing their damn minds.

I’m sure there are some self-hating reasons that a small percentage of Black women go blonde, but our reasons for dying our hair blonde are not much different than why White women do it.

It’s really not that serious.

natural hair

Damn! I look good!

READ THIS NONSENSE: Black Women Can’t Have Blonde Hair in the Workplace.

I went blonde recently because I have lots of grey hair growing sporadically throughout my head and I’d love to have a head full of grey, so I went platinum.

Since going blonde I’ve realized that it makes my coils stand out and I can see and appreciate the beauty of my texture a lot more than when it was dark.

But, I’m no stranger to dying my hair dark brown or black to cover the grey and I’ve been just about every shade of red in my lifetime.

Last but not least, and this is an important fact, there are Black people that grow blonde hair naturally!

Ask A Black Girl gives Black women the opportunity to candidly answer the controversial, common, and crude questions we are asked most often and some that are asked behind our backs.

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4 Replies to “Ask A Black Girl: Why do Black women hate their natural hair?”

  1. I’m with you! I would love to have a head of beautiful grey hair. However, I don’t think it runs in my family.

    I go natural, and it all has to do with laziness. My hair routine has 10 steps.
    1) I get in the shower.
    2) I add conditioner.
    3) I wash myself.
    4) I comb through my hair.
    5) I rinse my hair.
    6) Braid my hair.
    7) Get out of the shower
    8) Dry off (including my hair).
    9) Unbraid my hair in sections and moisturize with coconut oil.
    10) Continue my life.

    I’ve only tried braids once in the early 90s. It was awful. Took forever to put in. 3 months later, my head was so tender, taking them out was torture. I’ve never tried a weave.

    Before I went natural, I was constantly styling my relaxed hair. Going out took so much time & effort. Rain could ruin a good hair day. And it’s so much less expensive than relaxing or weaves. I’ve got my big toothed comb for the shower, conditioner, the occasional shampoo, and coconut oil.

    Natural hair fits my no-hassle style.

  2. I tried braids once too, many years ago. Never again. Hated the feeling of having fake hair and I had braids that kept coming out.

    Natural is definitely better as long as you have a care regimen that works.

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