In 2006, I tried writing a script for the first time and the following is what I came up with:
An original script
by Dangerous Lee
July 2006 Draft
1. BLACK SCREEN: Sound of baby crying.
2. INT: Hospital Delivery Room
A beautiful black baby is born and crying. The doctor and nurses are all in shock. We then see the mother and father who are white.
“What is it? What’s wrong?”
The child is then turned towards the mother and father. The father looks at his wife accusingly and begins to walk away. The mother looks at child and screams.
3. Int. Hospital Room in same hospital.
Black woman has given birth to a white child and she and her husband are trying to calmly discuss the situation.
“It may be albino!”
“Albino babies do not have brown hair.”
“Baby, I did not cheat on you, so there is no need for a DNA test but if that is what you want then go ahead and pull a Maury Povich on me!”
“I am most definitely getting a DNA test! I really don’t need one! Two black people cannot create a white baby!”
The mother starts to cry. At the same time a nurse brings in the baby for a feeding.
4. Int. Zoom to television in room
Special News Report
“All across the country there are reports of families giving birth to children who do not share the same skin color, but after having numerous DNA tests it shows that these children do indeed belong to them…”
I wrote this before I knew anything about Sandra Laing, a woman who comes from at least three generations of White ancestors but appears Black (of African descent). She is an example of atavism. Her family was unaware of their African roots.
I have never seen it, but a movie about her life, also titled Skin, was released in 2008.
I find her true life story along with my fictional tale to be quite amazing. At the time I wrote it I had no idea that this could and had really happened. Nothing ever came of this script but a three-part essay series I wrote and published in 2010 called The Half Series – When Black People Look White also tackles the subject and my experiences with skin color and race.
Remember the following fact the next time a Black woman or man is unjustly killed or why it is so hard for us to overcome the effects of racism in this country. Also factor in that many of us only want to assimilate. We are a minority in more ways than one.
In 2012 US Census Bureau estimated 44,456,009 African Americans in the United States meaning that 14.1% of the total American population of 313.9 Million is Black. This includes those who identify as ‘Black Only’ and as ‘Black in combination with another race’. The ‘Black Only’ category totaled 41.2 million African Americans or 13.1% of the total U.S population.
Question: To the people who don’t find black women/men attractive, why?
Black people seem to be the least liked by a lot of people on GAG, and I really don’t understand why..
The responses to this “popular question” on Girls Ask Guys really tripped me out!
Read responses via - GirlsAskGuys.com.
To be dangerous you must have some sort of influence. I think what makes me more dangerous is that I know where my talent is and how to not abuse it. I’m in the business of helping people find their inner peace and when you have the ability to teach someone how to be comfortable with who they are and can bring out the best in an individual…there lies a great source of power.
As a motivational speaker, when I step in front of an audience to speak or counsel an individual one on one, my desire is to always inspire greatness. I sell real potential… in an imaginary jar. I have to convince people they can, when they feel that they can’t. I show people who have lost focus in life the direction back to their goals. People come to me to become better people and I hope I manage to touch people’s lives in this positive light by making them strive to live their life to the fullest.
In today’s world, it’s rare that we stop long enough to understand how helping another benefits the whole of society. This is a “Me Me Me” generation that we live in. What makes me dangerous is that unlike stereotypes, I’m not a trouble maker or part of the problem but instead I fix troubled waters and I help people correct their problems. Oh by the way, did I mention that I happen to be Black and a Woman.
Are you a Dangerous Black Woman?
I wrote an optimistic blog on December 31, 2012 titled, Dangerous Lee’s Top Life Events of 2012 & Resolutions for 2013, in an attempt to write great things into existence and in the blog I go on and on about some of the good and bad experiences I had in 2012 and I proceed to talk about all the cool things I had planned for 2013. Well, let’s just say that I have not gotten in better shape and I’m not worried about it, I also shot a pilot for a TV show in 2013 and I have absolutely no idea where that stands and I’m also not going to worry about that,”Dangermas” sucked and no one, including me, gave a damn about it other than Senia and I got rid of my P.O. Box because most of the mail I received went straight to recycling. However, I did start recycling all paper products in 2013 as I said I would, so I am proud of that achievement. We gotta help the planet.
I am also proud and quite frankly shocked that I have been able to survive on less than $10,000 a year. There’s gotta be some type of recognition given to me and others like me. Getting by on less than $10,000 a year is a feat. Currently, I am driving a car that’s about to blow a gasket without tags or insurance, I’m hoping to get my student loans in deferment or forbearance for the hundredth time, I haven’t payed Consumers Energy in a few months, I owe Comcast more than I typically make in a month, I can’t always pay Senia’s monthly $17 violin rental on time and I sell what decent things I do own to consignment stores for extra money. I’m making it work. I really will survive.
Senia makes all A’s, we currently have a roof over our heads, food, our health (mine is questionable), electricity (we didn’t even lose power during a recent widespread power outage), we also currently have cable, phone and internet service, but most importantly we have supporters – my mother and people like you. Yes, you reading this helps!
In 2013, I also tried to give the ladies some weekly eye candy by featuring Hotties and while it seemed to work when I directly posted sexy images of men on Facebook, no one was checking for them once I placed them here at the network first. I thought: Zuckerberg is already a millionaire! Facebook does not need your extra hits, I do! Then I felt bad because that’s a selfish thought, but then I was OK with it because I’m broke as hell.
I also had many open calls to feature people or their business including an opportunity for music artists called, The D List, but it didn’t get many bites. Most of the people that ended up on The D List got there because I found them, not because they contacted me. Then again, being on The D List is often considered a bad thing. Maybe people didn’t get that the “D” stood for Dangerous and who am I to change the meaning that most are familiar with?!
I had a vision for this network and it was obviously a bad one or one that is ahead of its time. Can you believe that the three most popular articles featured this year are about nail polish, nurses and engineers? I can’t. And, no matter how hard I’ve tried I can’t get an intern to save my life. So, 2014 will be the year I stop trying so hard. 2013 was the year I was doing the most. In 2014, I will not be featuring tons of guest content by other writers as I have been for the last two years. It’s been said that insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. I haven’t gone completely insane…yet, so it’s time to change the plan.
Most of the content featured at DangerousLee.Biz in 2014 will be written or created by me. It’s time to be selfish. It’s time to focus on myself, my writing and my art; not other people’s art. I want to be more open and honest about my life and how I feel so that’s exactly what I am going to do. My main role was that of Publisher and Editor in Chief, now it’s time for me to get back to being an artist full time. My head is too small for all these hats.
2013 wasn’t all bad. Every website in the network was nominated for a Black Weblog Award and DangerousLee.Biz was selected as a Top Fashion Blog to Follow in 2013. I also created BlackGirlsAllowed.com because I am more than disgusted by the negative reputation, ugly image and lies being told as truths about Black women, so I am focusing on changing it to be more of what it really is from my POV and the POV of other Black women all over the world. SimplySenia.com has, to my delight and surprise, recently become monetized. With 5,327 ad impressions in November, Senia’s website made a whopping $12.43. Compare that to DangerousLee.Biz’s 316,919 ad impressions in November that equaled $642.93. Needless to say we’ve got to increase our viewer/readership greatly in 2014 if we want to increase our monthly and yearly income.
I’m not making any resolutions or huge plans for 2014, but I’m definitely hitting the reset button. I’m going deeper into bohemian/hippie mode. I’m gonna go with the flow to see what comes my way and deal with it all accordingly. I can’t wait to see how this turns out.
And yes, I’m still single. Interested men please inquire. Tips: Men I find physically and sexually attractive are Michael Ely, Blair Underwood and Wentworth Miller. To find out what else I like in my men you should read Keep Your Panties Up and Your Skirt Down, chapter – Dating Dangerous Lee ;)
Not only did he brush off the call for more black women in the Saturday Night Live cast earlier this Fall, he also put his rubber stamp of approval on what was possibly the most offensive two minutes of television I have viewed in a long time. For those of you that missed it, this past Saturday SNL featured a skit with a mock trailer for a fake film titled, “White Christmas.” The film was a spoof of the recent surge of black films parodied with an all-white cast. The “trailer” parodied the single mother struggling to make ends meet, who takes her son, Rasheed, to go stay with a relative (cue Paul Rudd as Tyler Perry’s “Madea”). According to the trailer, it featured everything “you’d” (I can only assume this is directed at non-black people) expect from a black movie, “women snapping peas,” “a gun-toting grandma,” and “a guy wearing a necklace over a turtleneck.” Perhaps it may have been mildly tolerable had it been left at that. However, it was the subtle, non-narrated portions of the skit that catapulted it over the line: the group of women sitting around talking about men being dogs who leave them for “white girls.” The gratuitous images of Paul Rudd as “Madea” shaking his overinflated rear-end and holding a plate of fried chicken. The quote from Town and Country saying, “I talked to the screen and it felt great.” The celebration of stereotypes that had little, if anything, to do with black film. There were a few somber clips of Keenan Thompson and Jay Pharoah looking into the camera. In the end, Jay Pharoah even asked if “we” were going to get in trouble for this, as if their comic solemnity somehow tempered the inherent offensiveness in the skit.
There is a litany of reasons why this skit was offensive. Not the least of which is inherent in the content of the skit. I won’t bore you with a history lesson. Google “Hottentot Venus” and “Saartijie Baartman” if you want to know the historical significance of why I don’t find a white man pretending to be a black woman with a prosthetic rear end funny. However, what I am more concerned about is our insistence on being in on this joke. What broke my heart more than anything was watching black women on social media struggle to find the humor in the skit, as if we weren’t the butt of the joke. It’s the same desperate attempt to be entertained by ignorant reality television with an heir of superiority, as if we can watch other black women degrade themselves and each other, call it “ratchet,” and thank God it’s not us.
It is us.
The truth is, as a black woman, when I walk into a room, my image has already been packaged, sold and purchased. Whether an individual admits it or not, one assumes what to expect of me before I even open my mouth and in every venue of my personal and professional life, I have been tasked to prove them wrong. In order to have my humanity accepted by the public, I must be an exception. I don’t eat fried chicken? Exception. I’m not concerned about a white woman stealing my husband? Exception. I’m not a single mother or struggling to make ends meet? Exception. The thing is, I could blame Lorne Michaels for producing the skit. I could even blame Keenan Thompson and Jay Pharoah for bugging their eyes and making their best well-paid-slave-face into the camera instead of giving the skit a big “hell no” the minute it came out of someone’s mouth (even though I wouldn’t be surprised if one of them wrote it).
Instead, I blame myself.
I blame myself for tuning into SNL on Saturday night despite their blatant disregard for the diversity of their cast. I blame myself for ever turning the channel to, paying money for, or supporting any stereotypical, damaging or poor representations of black women on film and television. I blame myself for watching a full season of any reality television show that negatively portrayed black women, our sisterhood, our sexuality, our beauty, or our ability to love and parent responsibly. I blame myself for once believing that rap music that calls women “bitches” wasn’t talking about me, it was talking about “another kind of woman.”
Some in our society wonder why we have shows like Black Girls Rock that insist on instilling in our girls a strong sense of self. Might I draw your attention to Exhibit A; SNL with a skit so full of psychological racism, and most people will likely never acknowledge its harm. Whether it is our names, our appearance, or our faith, the image of African American women is under attack. If the media isn’t highlighting the poor and distasteful behavior of a few, it is pumping the American public with stereotypes and statistics meant to divide us as a country and worst of all, fill us with self-hate. This week alone, a Facebook “friend” posted an article citing statistical proof to back up the fact that black women were the least desirable of all races in online dating. A few years ago, Psychology Today published an article about the inherent unattractiveness of black women. Everywhere we turn, statistics are telling us we are unattractive, ignorant, uneducated, diseased, and generally worthless.
Except when we aren’t.
Except when we are educated, beautiful, loving, strong, and worthy. F*ck SNL. And I mean that with all the respect I can muster. Far too many words have been wasted trying to convince others of the greatness of our humanity. We can demand better for ourselves and it starts by turning off the television and refusing to accept degradation. We can demand better because we are better.
At last! An honest, straightforward and unapologetic guide to help reduce culture shock between the races. Using the methods and tips within, you can ease the confusion of interacting with white people, establishing a more direct approach, ensuring your own sense of peace. Learn How to Communicate With Whites.
Identify which whites wear “The Mask”. Inside, you’ll find these points as well as: – Why whites are more courageous in the workplace (“The office is white people’s turf.”) – Why there still is little to no diversity in entertainment. (“Whites own all media. People of color own no outlets.”) – How to activate your very own personal White People B.S. Decoder (Whites say, “Let the past go”. Decoded, “Let us do what we want and shut up”.)
It’s disappointing to see how often black women are misrepresented in the media. It makes me cringe to see the cat fights and negative energy on screen. Especially when that energy can be utilized to make the world a better, more equal place to live.
As an adolescent, I was very sheltered. I attended highly respected private schools such as Rye Country Day School and Convent of the Sacred Heart here in the United States, as well as Fettes College in Edinburgh, Scotland. At these schools, my sister and I never fully experienced racism or hatred head on, but we were fully aware of its existence. Both of my parents, Ambassador Deinde and Madame Aduke Fernandez, suffered from mistreatment due to their race during their rise to success. Their stories of abuse have taught me how cruel the world can be – especially toward the black race. However, the one thing my dad has emphasized throughout my entire life is the ability to overcome anything with the support of a strong education.
Education is the reason I consider myself a dangerous black woman. I am armed with valuable knowledge, which has helped me stay strong and contributed to my success. When I set the goal to become a singer, I knew that I would have to work hard to be successful, however my education gave me the tools and resources to stay confident. When I finally signed to SMH Records, a Charlotte, NC based record label that focuses on developing and promoting new recording artists, I knew I had taken my first step to success. My debut singles will be appearing on the SMH compilation album, slated to be released in February 2014, will be a cross between Katy Perry and Rihanna with pop-driven guitar, that I will be playing, and a touch of soul.
Additionally, I’m gearing up for a new reality show, “Gold Blooded,” that will not only document the highs and lows of my successes, but will also provide a fun and exciting peek into my world. A world that includes recording, the music business and maybe a few perks because of my socialite status. Most importantly, it will show my development as an artist from beginning to the end. I intend for my work with SMH Records and “Gold Blooded” to represent how black women can achieve success with the help of a strong education, despite their history of mistreatment and segregation. Remember, knowledge is everyone’s readily accessible weapon – use it.
I created this Bitstrip to make a point about how so many of you are hypnotized by online media outlets like Bossip and TMZ and fail to support independent media in the same way. Low and behold, a day after I created it, TMZ posted a story with a poll asking if Black people should be referred to as Niggas or African Americans. Why? Because Suge Knight doesn’t want to be called African American because he’s not from Africa. Suge Knight is stupid. Stop supporting bullshit media. I’ve never had a real issue with TMZ until now, but his story is just irresponsible. They’ve lost my clicks.
My classmate left me distraught as she told me boldly and confidently that I was “an ugly black girl.” I ran home to my mother, tears in eyes, certain that being black meant being ugly and that it was a label I could never get rid of. I said to my mother, “Mommy, am I black and ugly?” She said to me, with her encouraging eyes, “Yes, precious. You are black, but you are certainly not ugly. The next time she comes to you saying you’re black and ugly, you just tell her ‘Yes, I’m black, but you’re just jealous because you’re not a pretty black girl like me, inside and out.”
These were the words my mother said to me that day and it has stuck with me for the rest of my life. Certainly the content of the message has changed, but the meaning behind the message hasn’t: no matter what people say, don’t believe them. You know who you are and that’s all that matters. No one can say anything about you that you don’t agree with. That was the last day I allowed anyone to say anything negative about me. It was the last time I allowed people’s ignorant opinions belittle me. And it was the day I became empowered.
Our media will have us believe that black women can’t get along and that it is in our nature to tear each other down. That we lack the skills to empower each other and to build ourselves into a dynamic group. That we would rather talk about each other, throw champagne in each others’ face, or disrespect each other for the sheer thrill of getting noticed. That’s not my story.
I’ve always been one to triumph over my trials…I’ve always been resilient. Even when all the cards were stacked against me and it seemed like there was no hope left, I was the one who not only would remain optimistic and hopeful but would try my best to empower others to be the same. Sometimes, when you are down, being empowering to others is the only way to get back up in those dark moments.
The mark of a Dangerous Black Woman is one who is not only empowered, but empowers others. It is those women who can take their misgivings and empower others because that is where they get their light in the middle of a dark tunnel.
I am a Dangerous Black Woman because I believe in the motto of my mother’s country, “out of many, one people.” As Dangerous Black Women: out of many, we are one.
Shawntel Asemota White learned early on that her purpose is to inspire others. She believes life is a series of stories that we are involved in and every moment is an opportunity to create a new line in our story. She considers herself a storyteller because she believes every event has a story to tell and it is her job to tell it in a compelling way. She created The SOA Brand, formerly SOA Event Concepts, a creative services agency that tells stories through visual design, creative strategy, and cultivated experiences that connects people to people and brands to people. She hopes to continue to grow this brand, making it the go to agency for inspired opportunities and stories.
Social media handles:
I am of the opinion that the strength of a Black woman is both a fact and a myth, in equal measures. Women of any color are inherently strong but it is the information gained from this perception about Black Women that can escalate the myth aspect of this subject. For Black women, the myth denigrates culpability for men to treat Black women respectfully. The ‘Strong Black Woman’ is abused as a result of this myth on the grounds that she is able to withstand any challenges coming her way independently and with little impact to her emotionally and physically. She is collectively left to raise children single-handedly, hold down employment and still be a tool to abuse sexually.
The Black Woman is deemed a misnomer and is portrayed as inconsequential to her existence. Whilst there is arguably a love for Black Women for some men, I am discussing the collective views from all men and all women of any color.
Black Women intrigue other women of differing race and are held in both mysticism and fear. This fear leads others to respond to the Black Woman negatively developing further challenges for them. Some of these challenges are highlighted above. The ‘alone’ factor is rife for the Black Woman who has to navigate through life sometimes as both matriarch and patriarch even if she is in a relationship. She is seen without needs of her own and demonstrably maligned in favor of soothing others even if this is in detriment to her well-being.
The Black woman paradoxically and altruistically responds by instigating her own war against herself. ‘I’m an independent woman and I am in no need for a man’ is a common mantra all the while secretly hankering for the love and comfort of a mate. Her soul is revealed to her Black female comrades who in some way share commonalities in their plight for individualism and respect. She can appear secretive, as she fears revealing her soul as her experiences inform her that she is vulnerable to further abuse.
Some Black men are foolishly scared of the strength of a Black woman and wages a surreptitious war against her promoting subservience and oppression towards her. This is not always done intentionally to harm her but their experience is matriarchal and top-heavy in its presence and not necessarily due to an absent father but more about how the family performed in everyday life. Older Black men were psychologically seen as Heads of families but in realities, it was the females that held families together. My experience of life has taught me that this sentiment is shared with many other races therefore not exclusive to Black families.
The Black Woman learns to grow into a role put forward by others and as mentioned previously, her own needs are ignored. This behavior is seen as abusive and the only way to remove this level of abuse towards her for the Black woman is to step away, independently, promoting the ‘strong’ aspect of the title question or stay in a relationship, whilst compromising her sanity.
There are many Black women who gravitate toward uplifting themselves and behave stereotypically enforcing this ‘strong’ aspect of the statement. They do this by not appearing of need and if they do show this need, it is sometimes misconstrued as ‘being needy’ because of the ‘strong’ aspect of the statement that runs deeper and more profound obscuring what the woman is actually presenting with behaviourally. Black women need to learn of the impact of mis-applying this statement to them. This misapplication happens when one assumes the role of ‘strong’ without first identifying its true meaning. Some may argue that this is how they choose to live their lives and this is absolutely fine but they also need to understand the ramifications of this ideology of being ‘strong.’ What does the response of others look and feels like whilst Black Women are portraying strength beyond and above all? I am not, for one minute, making an argument for subservience but laying out one of the causal factors of disruption that a Black on Black relationship may encounter. Even men of other color notes the curiously perceived ‘animalism’ of a Black woman and wants to play with her in order to tame her. The mystical and ‘wild’ nature of a Black Woman!
Black men are social ‘lepers’ and experience a tougher than acceptable life especially in the West. Their frustrations can be transferred to their female counterparts as they see her ‘getting through’ in life as strength, another aspect of how war is waged against her.
Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes argues that many generations later, individuals continue to live according to the emotional scars inflicted upon their fore-families although now free from the abhorrent and direct abuse of mind/body.
In times when Black Men were removed from their families after being beaten and persecuted for submission and control, the Black Women had to fight for existence. She had to fiercely protect her children without her husband. She had to learn to do this fight at a time when her spirit was being broken and exposed for further abuse. Attacking the thing or things that one holds dear completes destruction. For doing so, attacks the spiritedness of the individual from the inside, rendering them without anchor.
Dr. Pinkola Estes argues that the removal of sacred images that anchors a person was to ‘Un-Mother’ that person. Black people were reliant upon their sacred images to guide them through life, like other races. Parts of the psyche (soul/spirit) becomes damaged and retreats underground (subconscious) whilst the obvious afflictions are felt and seen on a conscious level. According to Pinkola, to destabilize a person’s spirit is to ‘Un-Mother’ them.
People that are grounded in a Mother can present as dangerous due to exhibiting autonomous traits, not so easily manageable, loyal to their beliefs. The removal of these beliefs and replacement of another version helps to destabilize the spirit of people therefore easier to be manipulated.
Individuals that were spiritually removed from their beliefs therefore grounding learned to fear the attackers whilst paradoxically feeling grateful for their existence. Internalizing the damage that ‘un-mothering’ a person has on an individual. For example, within the workplace, your employer could be extremely abusive or just plain unfair but the inherent message meted out by your company and society is one of being grateful for your employment. You fear of speaking out as to do so is met with backlash; the result is the submission of one’s soul. Therefore this method of control continues today and it is the deep-rooted residue of fear caused by the removal of the ‘Mother’ that continue this emotional self-destruction. In this instance for the Black Woman but you can see evidence of this throughout society not initially done for the same reason but the continued use is handy.
The removal of the sub-conscious Mother and the replacement of something incomprehensible have helped to create the Black Woman today. Her grounding, her beliefs, her identity have been removed and she continues to fight for existence now as a result of her previous struggle. This worsening effect is apparent even if misunderstood by many including the Black Woman herself. The misinformed information derived about the Black Woman coupled with history has led to her being seen as ‘strong’ (fact) and without need, the ‘myth’ aspect. However, ‘One can heal by literally making a list of all freedoms denied and then working backwards’… (Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes).
It is difficult to speak about women of any color without identifying to some degree, the impact of feminisms. The word is pluralized deliberately as not only were there first, second and now third wave feminisms, the relationship and resonance felt by Black Women somewhat removes feminisms’ full implication from them. Therefore the common terminology of feminism does not fully include the Black Woman. Both my grandmothers were hard, consistent workers, in predominantly ‘female’ roles. These roles did not even attract a moderate salary; just enough to help their husbands pay towards the household bills. What was interesting was how their changing thoughts changed their beliefs (environmental) when they came to live in the UK. In their own hometown, women married, had children and mainly stayed working in the home, not unlike westernized general rule. Very few women had substantive posts in the community. Due to the many difficulties experienced by individuals in England, America or Canada where a lot of migration took people to, their beliefs needed to radically change to survive. This change meant for some families, older children were raising younger children whilst both parents worked. In most cases, it was the female offspring that assumed a matriarchal role in the absence of the mother. The creation of a sub-culture for these families borne mainly from financial difficulties, allowed Black Women to be more prominent but not equal to their men. My generation of women has pushed this concept further and expects a more equal participant as partners. Something that is akin to White western women yet not easily recognized nor taken on by men.
More recognition is needed in society for the promotion for all women and not just Black Women but the problems that Black Women face are different to their counterparts. I do feel that the huge radicalization needed for women’s lives cannot be measured today from where it was once borne but we should be able to continue building upon the well-being for women and by doing so, all of society benefits. Harm the woman; harm the child!
So yes, Black women are strong but it is also a myth that she is able to withstand anything thrown at her. Just take a look around you and many Black women are former shadows of thy self. Even the perceptually well-adapted ones experiences emotional discord due to the ‘myth’ aspect therefore how she is then treated. Black Women contributes to half of society in gender terms but their experiences of negativity is out of balance. The ‘myth’ aspect is out of control and depletes the Black Women of her natural resources to live in harmony with her and others.
Clarissa Pinkola Estes (Untie The Strong Woman; p.86- 90)
My name is Marcea Hibbert-Roye, qualified Social Worker and Life Coach. My specialism is developing emotional awareness in females. I have devised a 6 Step Program that promotes good emotional health by accessing information held in the subconscious mind to the conscious mind. The result is having more control over thoughts, feelings and behavior.
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