Michael Joe Jackson 1958-2009

One of my senior highschool photos from 1993
One of my senior photos from 1993

Michael was more to me than a great entertainer. He was the love of my life. I truly loved him as a person. I understood him. Those that know me and know me well know where I am coming from, but let me explain a little for those that don’t.

Besides my grandfather, Michael was the only constant male figure in my life growing up. I thought he was beautiful and I loved to watch him move. My mother took me to see The Wiz at age 2, took me to his concerts as early as age 4, bought his music for me, and I fell in love with him over the years.

Michael taught me to love everyone no matter what race, creed, color, or religion. He taught me to care for our planet and to have compassion for those that were ill. He also kept me from getting involved with boys at an early age because I was so devoted to him.

Michael was a beautiful person in every way to me; so sweet, kind, and giving. Even in the end he wanted to give more of himself to us by performing when, in my opinion, he should of been enjoying his life without performing and raising his children. I do understand that Michael wanted to come back one last time to prove that he is the best and leave a greater legacy that would overshadow his plastic surgery, debt, or molestation allegations, but he never needed to prove anything to me.

Did I ever question the allegations and wonder if Mike was capable of such a thing? Of course I did! I didn’t see Michael as a God or a perfect entity. I saw him as a human being with flaws like the rest of us. Loving Michael does not make a person go insane, become dumb, or unable to see the truth. I saw through the BS of the allegations and fortunately so did a jury of his peers.

Over the years as I have become an adult my “obsession” for him has toned down, but I always loved and supported him. I never believed the hype when it came to him being weird, bizarre, or a child molester. As a survivor of child sexual abuse I do not support anyone that I believe has been involved in that type of behavior.

I am in disbelief, confused, numb, heartbroken, sad…words cannot express what I really feel. Michael was my family. He was and will always be a major part of who I am. I suppose he can rest now and perform forever in heaven or where ever we go when we leave this earth.

I give my love and support to his family and fans all around the world.

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46 thoughts on “Michael Joe Jackson 1958-2009

  1. I am missing Michael. The world has truely lost a great entertainer, there will Never be anyone else like him. But he is home with god now. Lets take a lesson from michael, You must live your life to the fullest no matter who or what stand in your way. Michael, You will be surely missed.!!!

  2. I am missing Michael. The world has truely lost a great entertainer, there will Never be anyone else like him. But he is home with god now. Lets take a lesson from michael, You must live your life to the fullest no matter who or what stand in your way. Michael, You will be surely missed.!!!

  3. Your words brought tears to my eyes because I could feel the love and pain in your message. Thank you for sharing it with us πŸ™‚

  4. Your words brought tears to my eyes because I could feel the love and pain in your message. Thank you for sharing it with us πŸ™‚

  5. My heart goes out to you and everyone who will be mourning the loss of the man and not just the entertainer. Your words were beautifully written. I’m so glad I had the opportunity to share some Michael moments with you.

  6. My heart goes out to you and everyone who will be mourning the loss of the man and not just the entertainer. Your words were beautifully written. I’m so glad I had the opportunity to share some Michael moments with you.

  7. That was absolutely beautiful, and I understand completely. I always thought he’d be around forever, I never wanted to see this day. I’ve been ridiculed on other boards for my opinions of him but I’ve always supported him, loved him, believed him. At least now nobody can touch him, he’s safe, he can’t be hurt anymore, I’m taking strength from that.

    Tragic, he was so young, he had so much more to give. I had tickets for the O2 on the 26th July, one month from today, I was just so pleased to have been able to support him and be a fan and not just a journalist there to watch for any mistakes to report. He, and we have been robbed of a goodbye and I guess the fans will always feel that, but he didn’t have a long illness that I knew of, and wasn’t in that kind of suffering for months.

    Hugs to you Lee, I don’t know you at all, but I feel we’re connected in our grief.

    Love and light MJ, always loved, never doubted.

    Bev x

    1. I kinda thought he’d be here forever too, or at least that he would die a peaceful death when I was much older. Thanks so much for posting here, Bev, and now we do know wach other!

  8. That was absolutely beautiful, and I understand completely. I always thought he’d be around forever, I never wanted to see this day. I’ve been ridiculed on other boards for my opinions of him but I’ve always supported him, loved him, believed him. At least now nobody can touch him, he’s safe, he can’t be hurt anymore, I’m taking strength from that.

    Tragic, he was so young, he had so much more to give. I had tickets for the O2 on the 26th July, one month from today, I was just so pleased to have been able to support him and be a fan and not just a journalist there to watch for any mistakes to report. He, and we have been robbed of a goodbye and I guess the fans will always feel that, but he didn’t have a long illness that I knew of, and wasn’t in that kind of suffering for months.

    Hugs to you Lee, I don’t know you at all, but I feel we’re connected in our grief.

    Love and light MJ, always loved, never doubted.

    Bev x

    1. I kinda thought he’d be here forever too, or at least that he would die a peaceful death when I was much older. Thanks so much for posting here, Bev, and now we do know wach other!

  9. You know I’m heartbroken and devastated. I just can’t believe it and I’m sitting here in utter shock. In all the years we’ve done MJJForum, we never, ever expected this.

    *sigh*

    Love you, Lei….

  10. You know I’m heartbroken and devastated. I just can’t believe it and I’m sitting here in utter shock. In all the years we’ve done MJJForum, we never, ever expected this.

    *sigh*

    Love you, Lei….

  11. Wonderful tribute.

    Today on local talk radio, one host did not get how folks got so ATTACHED to celebrities. I often wondered about that but some have touched ME over the years and you kind of explained it well…. how Michael touched you and was a constant in your life. I get that. I also felt that way about Johnny Carson who came into my home for as long as I could remember at night..but at least I got to see him retire and sign off. But I cried like a baby watching. My only male relative I knew outside my immediate family died in 86, my father in 90. Johnny was the last of the ‘constants’ in my lives and the words I often fell asleep to.

    Many folks touch us with their art/music/talk and are only in our homes as voices via radio or visuals on tv. That does not lesson their presences of their spirit. They keep many company on lonely nights, when we struggle, or when we have lost many relatives as we ourselves age.

    While Michael loved many and gave to others, I am saddened HIS life did not have real people in it to give LOVE to him, but apparently, like Elvis, MJ was surrounded by enablers.

    I also believe many come through this world, being such fine actors/entertainers, at the expense of good personal relationships in private lives. Many genuises are like that…not great social skills with family/friends but can give to strangers or fans in many ways at the expense of their own selves.

    I am sorry you are hurting so badly with this..Michael’s song was the first song I slow danced to with Jackson Five (I’ll be There) with my jr high beau Wayne K. So Michael’s music was a major part of my childhood. Got to Be there, ABC, Rockin’ Robin, etc.

    I am saddened and disgusted with today’s media and will not give it my energy to watch them drag every nuance through the mud.

    Thankfully Elvis and Lennon died before 24/7 cable news as the cretins today will milk the drama & comedians will use him for fodder on their talk shows.

    Instead, I choose to remember Michael for what he did for fans and his inspiration for other musicians. Not the sordid details of poor choices he made (surgeries, debt, living his childhood forever due to NO CHILDHOOD of his own, drugs ?)

    Sorry to post such a long reply but I just totally understand your words.

    Be nice to yourself in the next few weeks.

    Peace

    Sophia

    1. Thanks so much for stopping by and posting, Sophia. I appreciate you taking the time to write so many meaningful things.

  12. Wonderful tribute.

    Today on local talk radio, one host did not get how folks got so ATTACHED to celebrities. I often wondered about that but some have touched ME over the years and you kind of explained it well…. how Michael touched you and was a constant in your life. I get that. I also felt that way about Johnny Carson who came into my home for as long as I could remember at night..but at least I got to see him retire and sign off. But I cried like a baby watching. My only male relative I knew outside my immediate family died in 86, my father in 90. Johnny was the last of the ‘constants’ in my lives and the words I often fell asleep to.

    Many folks touch us with their art/music/talk and are only in our homes as voices via radio or visuals on tv. That does not lesson their presences of their spirit. They keep many company on lonely nights, when we struggle, or when we have lost many relatives as we ourselves age.

    While Michael loved many and gave to others, I am saddened HIS life did not have real people in it to give LOVE to him, but apparently, like Elvis, MJ was surrounded by enablers.

    I also believe many come through this world, being such fine actors/entertainers, at the expense of good personal relationships in private lives. Many genuises are like that…not great social skills with family/friends but can give to strangers or fans in many ways at the expense of their own selves.

    I am sorry you are hurting so badly with this..Michael’s song was the first song I slow danced to with Jackson Five (I’ll be There) with my jr high beau Wayne K. So Michael’s music was a major part of my childhood. Got to Be there, ABC, Rockin’ Robin, etc.

    I am saddened and disgusted with today’s media and will not give it my energy to watch them drag every nuance through the mud.

    Thankfully Elvis and Lennon died before 24/7 cable news as the cretins today will milk the drama & comedians will use him for fodder on their talk shows.

    Instead, I choose to remember Michael for what he did for fans and his inspiration for other musicians. Not the sordid details of poor choices he made (surgeries, debt, living his childhood forever due to NO CHILDHOOD of his own, drugs ?)

    Sorry to post such a long reply but I just totally understand your words.

    Be nice to yourself in the next few weeks.

    Peace

    Sophia

    1. Thanks so much for stopping by and posting, Sophia. I appreciate you taking the time to write so many meaningful things.

  13. WOW Leigh…you made me cry during the entire article…It’s nice to know I have a friend like you that loves MJ…My mom actually called me during Laszlo’s T-Ball game to let me know..It was very sweet of her..I use to perform for her and the neighbors that lived in the townhouses and apartments at the swimming pool.. πŸ™‚ I ALWAYS wore my glove… πŸ™‚ I miss you tons!! He’s in a better place now! Love you girl, Marcia

    β€œIn a world filled with hate, we must still dare to hope. In a world filled with anger, we must still dare to comfort. In a world filled with despair, we must still dare to dream. And in a world filled with distrust, we must still dare to believe.” ~ Michael Joseph Jackson

  14. WOW Leigh…you made me cry during the entire article…It’s nice to know I have a friend like you that loves MJ…My mom actually called me during Laszlo’s T-Ball game to let me know..It was very sweet of her..I use to perform for her and the neighbors that lived in the townhouses and apartments at the swimming pool.. πŸ™‚ I ALWAYS wore my glove… πŸ™‚ I miss you tons!! He’s in a better place now! Love you girl, Marcia

    β€œIn a world filled with hate, we must still dare to hope. In a world filled with anger, we must still dare to comfort. In a world filled with despair, we must still dare to dream. And in a world filled with distrust, we must still dare to believe.” ~ Michael Joseph Jackson

  15. Those word were so touching to me. I think he was very special and most people were too blind to see it. On the bright side he can finally be in peace, away from all the BS that constanly surronded him.

  16. Those word were so touching to me. I think he was very special and most people were too blind to see it. On the bright side he can finally be in peace, away from all the BS that constanly surronded him.

  17. I keep thinking how I want to put my feelings into words about Michael Jackson’s life and death and what he and all this has meant to me. I am not sure there is any need, because you basically summarized what I feel. I love Michael so much. May he finally be rewarded the peace he deserves in a much better place. My heart breaks for the world and especially his family and children. Michael trully did make the world a better place just from his being. We were all his children in a sense.

  18. I keep thinking how I want to put my feelings into words about Michael Jackson’s life and death and what he and all this has meant to me. I am not sure there is any need, because you basically summarized what I feel. I love Michael so much. May he finally be rewarded the peace he deserves in a much better place. My heart breaks for the world and especially his family and children. Michael trully did make the world a better place just from his being. We were all his children in a sense.

  19. Great tribute to Mike J, Dangerous!!!

    I was sitting here watching a little bit of “This Is It” tonight and I thought about you.

    I wish we could have had a chance to hookup at some point today and pay tribute to Mike, but maybe another time….hopefully soon.

  20. Great tribute to Mike J, Dangerous!!!

    I was sitting here watching a little bit of “This Is It” tonight and I thought about you.

    I wish we could have had a chance to hookup at some point today and pay tribute to Mike, but maybe another time….hopefully soon.

Tell me how you feel!